Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
