What a fucking waste of an outfit
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
