my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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