R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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