I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
