next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
