I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
