I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
