Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
