Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
When are your genitals available?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
