i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
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