and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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