I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
