your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
