dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
nutella sex= disaster
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
