In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
