hell yes lets make some ravioli
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
