Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
