I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I love having hate sex.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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