girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize