I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
