I hate your face
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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