nut hugger
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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