talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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