The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
