I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I love you. Go after that dick
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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