absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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