haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I feel like death gave me a hand job
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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