you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
