woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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