Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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