is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
