rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
