hotel room ftw
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Buhtt sex?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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