i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
