hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
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