There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I'm at about main and main street
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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