is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize