Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
