She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Randomize
