I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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