The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I wanna passion pit in your ass
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
