so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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