her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
