That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
