yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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