youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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