Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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