man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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