the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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