Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Boobs are out for the taking
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
